Eternal Sunshine For A Spotless Mind

Just watched this movie again tonight. It was such a beautiful, insightful, romantic movie. i have bad memories. When i watched it again it is totally like new to me. So touching.

無期

身在異鄉, 歸去無期的感覺一點也不好受.原來跟出trip是不一樣的.

公幹時, 心裏面有個底, 總有個時間可以回家, 旅程中就不段想著去在短時間中見識多一點, 玩得盡興一點, 完全沒有想回去的感覺, 總覺得玩得不夠.

但現再我並沒有回家的期限, 也沒有任何計劃, 每天就想著又捱多了一天, 不知何時才完結...遙遙無期, 去玩也沒有心機...

好掛住家中的晚餐...

Hamburg!!!!!!!

Oh! by the way i am settled down in hamburg, germany. thinks are looking good, everything was perfect! i get a big big room for myself and i get to drive alot now! here are my pictures.

http://picasaweb.google.com/lazylab/BunSNewHomeInHamburg

oh i think i need to start blogging again... for myself at least...

I'm still alive

Just to let u know i have alot to say but i don't want to type. thank you.
see you later. wait for me.

Word of Wisdom

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. - Mark Twain

Fan Lok Shan

Yeah, it's you.

the one who gave me some of the most happiest memories
in my most innocent years.
that was the pure, honest fun.

you showed me a new world of exploration and adventure
you taught me something that i can learn from no one.

we used to be so close,
now we're parted.

Make sure you take good care of yourself,
and do your best to live well.

No one can take you away from my heart.

哪個是真我

不想令人見到的東西，
卻是最多人留意的，
經常出現在人眼中的，
卻是最不起眼，
最缺乏注意的…

一個經常在所謂「隱藏真我」的同時，
亦正在大聲表白自己喜歡「隱藏真我」的隱藏了真我的真我，
也就是最令人矛盾的沒有隱藏了真我的真我‧

哪個是真我？
你眼中的真我是真的我，
還是我心中的真我才是真我，
還是「隱藏了的真我」之中的真我才是真我？

一個永遠不能解答的問題永遠有人去尋根究底，
一個顯然易明的問題卻永沒有人能夠說出答案來…

(some old writings dated 14-11-2000, at CityU P4902 room)

Windsurf Day!

wowowowo hohohohho!

after 15 months of not being on top of a surfboard now i'm back! we went to the Stanley Main beach water center, i was pretty new in there and it took me 90 mins to rig up my gear and got into the water..... the place was so cramped up and all these "systematic" way of arranging things actually slow us down... compared to the St. Stephen bay i can finish my job in 20 mins! anyways i will be faster next time.

God! the wind is great keep going on 15 to 20 knots and me and cow keep going on the PLANE! flying here and there! of course there are some better people flying much much faster than us

i was exhausted! and i still feel the swells going up and down here sitting at home...my hands have no strength now...

I feel like a tool

Hi, my name is B, and i feel like a tool.
a tool that hopefully it's useful, but not obvious
it dosent takes up too much space, but when you need it, it could be very handy
and it's helpful, too.

But this tool is different, this tool is longing for some respect.
However most people do not respect the tool by saying or doing anything to the tool.
They respect it by using it, they respect it by making the most out of it, they respect by choosing it, they respect it by taking all advantages of it.
This is how people respect a tool. if you're not good enough, they don't even think about you.

This tool is longed for someone to understand, too.
However most people do not understand the reason why the tool here and why it behave like this. they just understand what is it's function and what can do with it when you use it.

A tool is not a thinking individual, it is only something controlled by someone to achieve the goal and facilate the job. it is not designed to complete the job automatically.

Hi, my name is B, and i feel like a tool. a very helpful tool.

Motorbike ride in HK!

Yoooooooooyoooooooooooo!!!!

my friend Kenny suddenly called to give me a motorbike ride, from central to sai kung!!!!! ooooooooooh

so happy! he drove so fast but very stable, and i had lot of fun! we droved on many highways and also the curvy roads... we had a great time eating and chatting in saikung!

you see how happy i am!? we were crossing the eastern cross-harbor tunnel. I was soooo happy and excited like a kid..... and i did look like one!!! yeah!!! afterall i didn't look so old! wish i can keep it forever... i don't mind being a kid...

叫你呀

呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀, 呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀呀

我愛疤痕

傷口經過悉心的照料後
快要康復了
多了一道疤痕
疤痕會淡的
但我卻愛它
愛它曾經帶給我的痛楚
代表人生又上多一課

幻想追求認識認識認識認識認識認識認識
認識認識

認識

認識

可惜

what's the use of a journal

is this place supposed to be the place i can write everything i want?
of, it has already became a stage to entertain anyone?

i have a lot of things i would like to write down.
but i want to keep it private.

溫馨提示

奉勸各位從今以後不要再“ 條女, 條仔“ 相稱
好唔專重人
除非你女友 / 男友喜歡你或其他人這樣稱呼他們
又或這你喺 “隨便搵條女玩吓，隨便搵條女搞吓嘢“ 而對方都是這樣想，就可以這樣稱呼

大家都大個啦
再俾我聽到我會鄙視你的
大可以用“女友，我女人，我另一半“稱呼
溫馨好多

甚麼是青春

甚麼是青春?
如果要找出我青春年代和現在的分別，應該可以看出一些端倪：隨著逝去的青春我已經失去了甚麼。

1) 對月餅的瘋狂食慾
2) 六舊腹肌及強壯的四頭肌
3) 滑溜溜的, 不像香港人的孩子臉
4) windows cdkey, 幾十個人電話, 生日, 學生証及密碼的記憶力
5) 不用睡覺的能力
6) 發呆的時間
7) 不負責任的權利

Where is the control

I have lost my control on my life!!!!!!!!
what should i do!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The worst situation

She said, "you are from outer space."
He said, "we all came from the outer space."

Love is....

Love should be compliment but not supplement.


...Thanks to the word of wisdom, VIV

Strange things that i do (part 1)

1) Walking on the opposite side of the road.

2) Taking the longer, unusual path walking back home

3) Thinking about many cruel ways to beat up a person, and actually having a lot of fun thinking about it

4) Talk to the cat about my problems

5) Lying down in the middle of the drive way

6) Thinking about riding a Bicycle FAST - while every time i was in a bunch of crowd.

7) Keep a weird expression on my face when i am feeling hot

8) Write my name on a flower

Beloved DauDau

My Beloved DauDau,
Can you listen to what i say?
I wish i can talk with you.

Traveling makes me feel better

in my mind now is only

travel travel travel travel travel travel travel travel
travel travel travel travel travel travel travel travel
travel travel travel travel travel travel travel travel
travel travel travel travel travel travel travel travel
travel travel travel travel travel travel travel travel
travel travel travel travel travel travel travel travel
travel travel travel travel travel travel travel travel
travel travel travel travel travel travel travel travel

i feel better now

DAMIEN RICE - 9 CRIMES

香港腳

work in beijing is very busy.

the most busy day of the year

today is the most busy day of the year for me. i am so tired. i could not finish the to do list today. it makes me wonder how come i am so unproductive while other people can manage a multi billion international corporation (maybe a few together at one time) and still manages to go play golf, and partying.

______________________________________________

OKAY. now i am going to talk about my financial life. you know what? HSBC. full name: The Hongkong and Shanghai Banking Corporation. seems to be the biggest bank in Hong Kong but i don't have an account there.I want to make a loan there and do what i wanted to do. i want to invest some stocks and buy some funds there. i want to earn money..... you are just too kind reading my bull shit. thank you... If i want to invest which one should i go to? HSBC or just go to Franklin Templeton? American Express? AIA? AIG? .... .........what am i talking about?

Me and You

寂寞中對我不離不棄的人

今天又不知是第幾個週末一個人過。還未習慣這種無助的孤獨感，於是想起了我的好朋友們。誰不知不是沒人接電話，就是佳人有約。還好，原來我的朋友全部都在HAVING FUN。

由於在中環上班，每逢周五晚放工後都有很多衣著光鮮的型男索女出現。熙來攘往，十分精彩。有的是情侶檔，有的是一班FRIEND去玩，有一些明顯走得快一點的單身人士肯定是有約於蘭桂，有的穿著得特別性感的女子，施施然地慢步出地鐵站，認該是今晚出來打獵的。

見到各位都好有目的去玩，自己卻因為無人理，一邊等著剛才沒接電話的朋友CALL我，慢慢地拖著腳步不情願地向回家的方向走。終於走道地鐵車廂裏，電話響了，我不用山伯孤伶伶了！心想「還來得及返出去的。」見到一個陌生的電話號碼，應該是哪個朋友在外面打給我的。「喂？」傳來的是一把開朗友善的聲音。

「先生您好，我地係和記3中港通加打梨架...」

「...哦...我想我唔需要啦唔該...」

沉溺浪漫的攝影師

今天在公司裏走過去廁所時, 剛巧收音機裏有人在說故事. 我剛聽到幾個字:

"...沉溺浪漫的攝影師..."

前文後語已聽不清楚了. 但是這八個字卻很深刻, 令我在廁所裏頭泛起了一陣陣的思考.

實在是太cool了. 我都想以"沉溺浪漫的攝影師"自居. 但是我個人来說並不浪漫, 我也不認為自己是一個攝影師...

看來要有耍cool的本錢還需努力一番

-------------------------------------

看過阿公今天幾千字的blog post, 又要廢噏幾句

1) 同意, 我都是市井的人, 我為此自豪
2) 對我來說, 阿公你也是能做到很多東西出來的人, 我也深感佩服. 你要繼續努力!
3) 12年後我還是要捉你們出來飲茶歎世界. 我...想好明年可以做甚麼再說吧.
4) 對面的男人笑你呀
5) 漂漂亮亮的OL，一式一樣的名貴手袋令我作嘔. 你地白痴㗎, 唔用Gucci LV Chanel Dior 唔識做人呀, 你地敷淺可憐到極點, 要有性格就不如著suit用百佳膠袋呀, 咁我就respect喇!
6) 做一個不設實際的男人是挺浪漫的.

-------------------------------------

終於可以扮吓你地呢班文化人啦, 小弟今天在看思果先生的<香港之秋>, 書裏面附錄的其中一篇說現代人的中文實在差勁, 他舉出了很多很多仔細分析的例子, 說得我體無完膚, 我們的中文真的太差, 尤期是大眾讀物經常犯語病, 教壞細路, 全部中文的字詞擺位其實是英語格式, 是劣譯, 是劣文, 剛巧我要校正 (proof read) 公司的catalog, 完全發現書中的所及問題, 詞不達意, 簡直改到我想死, 我以後寫中文要多加留意, 多謝思果老師!

Prioritization Disorder

I am sure this is a term that dosen't exist. and it must also be spelled wrongly.
But i am sure i have this illness. Significantly.

So Called Prioritization Disorder, means i have difficulty in ordering things. When i face a bunch of work, i need to prioritize them, find what is most important and urgent, and make it on top of my to do list of the day, then, put the most unimportant non-urgent tasks on the bottom of my list.

This simple thing already causes me a lot of trouble. i find it very hard to order my tasks. I don't know which is more important. even if i do, i find it extremely difficult to put it on top of my to do list.

I tend to do the least important, least urgent tasks first.
Like... writing this blog. I should be filling up my application form for my German working visa.

Maybe the prioritization disorder is just an excuse for me to let myself continue like this. what i lack is just some self discipline and focus and determination in finishing the tasks. last but not least, i need some passion of life.

To be more exact, I have cognitive disorder. There is such a term and i am sure i have this problem.

holiday - or is it

it's holiday
wanna do something
but no one is free
i can't go alone
what should i do
i would probably work at home then...

_________________________

Finally posted the SME3012 onto ebay for my family. hope someone really buy it then we can earn some extra money out of the junk in my home! Guys please check it out!

_________________________

Invented a new way of using laptop on the bed. very healthy! try it!

Father's Day

Slept until 1400
feeling dizzy and tired
then sleep again
from 1645 to 1900
even more tired and more dizzy
what should i do
i should now sleep again

failed.... loosing grip on myself

i failed my driving test today.
i thought i was cool and i really did well before
but when the test begins i lost control on everything
i did series of serious mistakes.
mistakes that no one can be blamed but my inability to stay focused and calm.

i failed my driving test today.
that's not surprising at all. i have expected that.
but i was upset about my performance.
what went wrong? i suddenly felt like i didn't know how to drive.
my mind was all empty. i couldn't remember the course.

i failed on myself today.
i was down, down, down
and i felt incredibly lonely right now.

Lightning

Lightning.

it was 3am at night and i was facinated by the magnificent view from the outside.
Even thought i am so sleepy, i couldn't sleep.

Dazed, amazed.

被教主Reject

斌： 教主，要唔要我幫你成立德國分舵？

教主： 唔得呀，你無資格呀！

斌： 下！點解呀？

教主： 你個人太怕孤獨啦，你唔單止堅守唔到教規，你仲分分鍾仲會攪我D教友添呀！

斌： ‧‧‧‧‧‧

i believe i can fly

i dun wanna work here on land.

away from all the noise, terrible messy chaosy world
wanna work in a office up at 38000 feet
with the stunning view.

where there is calm, where i can embrace the cloud, the sun, the moon, and the stars.

6.4

I finally went there
feel the presence
i am glad that i am living in HK
i am glad that HK people never forgets
and i hope all of these unanswered questions can be solved.

we need to do something
we need to stand up

3.14159265358979323846

Finally he's gone back.
relief.
Still comprehending what had happened in these few days.
wow.

wish him good luck.

雲

站在漂亮的沙灘水裡
清清的水
細細的沙
藍藍的天
白白的雲

這幾天天氣實在很好
像夢境一樣的
厚厚的 有一點油畫的味道
又有一點超現實的感覺
你卻不在這裡 看不到

聽著耳機裏的 "飞べない翼"
看著天上的雲
站著不動
出了神
把我完全迷倒了

又想起了你
突然有一種奇怪的
溫馨的感覺
鼻子一酸
兩眼充滿了淚水

雖沒有強烈的想念
卻發覺我腦裡全是你

So Hot

So hot So hot!
好熱好熱!

Ah Pai went out with us today, i'm glad that we went to the carpark in ocean terminal. my favorite secret spot. It's too hot to do anything, best is sit there and enjoy the breeze and the beautiful harbor.

i enjoy this kind of life. reminds me of my happiest teenage. young and dangerous. haha

happy hill

you know what?
i still love you.

unhealthy romantic person

i always consider myself a romanticist.
but i am not a romantic person.
to me, everything is romantic.

having dinner is romantic.
being starved is romantic.
going out with friends is romantic.
being alone is romantic.
walking home in late night is romantic.
buying ice-cream in 2am is romantic.
cooking instant noodle is romantic.
mopping the floor is romantic.
jumping up is romantic.
laying down is romantic.
romantic.
playing piano is romantic.
don't know any music is romantic.
going to school is romantic.
going to work is romantic.
thinking is romantic.
not thinking is also romantic.
looking at someone you love is romantic.
looking in the mirror is romantic.
getting lost is romantic.
finding a way is romantic.

lonely is romantic.
sad is romantic.
crying is romantic.
pain is romantic.

i feel romantic.
i am too unhealthily romantic.

A conversation with a CX pilot

I finally called Jacky, the Cathay Pacific pilot. before i call i was quite nervous, dunno what to say. but then i decided, damn it! then i called.

he was actually very nice and very helpful, he keep talking non-stop for like... 30 minutes!
he gave me many useful information and shared alot of other thing to me about a Pilot life, that i have never heard of.

he's cool... he was a private pilot since 15, and became a cathay pacific pilot since 24, and he's now 29...and his wife is a private pilot too...

i really like him. i am gonna call him more often! hope i can learn more from him, get more information, maybe one can i can meet him and befriend with him.

...hopefully one day i can work with him!
add oil! new bun!

good bye bun

goodbye bun, goodbye.
good bye the old bun.
it's time for you to leave,
it's time for you to leave.
i will be forever grateful
for everything you have learned
for every experience you have earned.

you lived your life,
you had fun.
you laughed, you cried.
you loved, you lied.

now it's time for me to take over
it's time for you to start another life.

Cathay Pacific Pilot's contact

Got a pilot's email and phone number today!
he's from cathay pacific and he is a very young pilot!
still under 30!

he told me to call him directly
ask for suggestions and informations...
i am nervous
dunno where to start
i am too shy or too humble?
maybe i am just too ignorant and stupid

girls... want his number?

如果

如果我深深的傷害了你，請原諒我。
如果你還在問我為什麼，請明白我。
如果我成為了你的負累，請放開我。
如果我這次自私了一點，請理解我。
如果你能生活得更快樂，請忘記我。

SAVE ME

借人家的一幅照片來用。
我現在有說不出的感慨。

我要加油!!!!!

人與人的關係真是太太太奇怪
我雖絕不能接受這應是必然的
無奈的我只有每天去反省自己
努力地要去改善成為更好的人

賓 = 斌

Statistics of people guessing my name "Bun":
90% - 賓
9.9% - 彬
0.1% - 斌

i just couldn't figure it out, i have never meet anyone named 賓 actually. To me the only thing named with it is 菲律賓, 凍檸賓, 羅賓 and 柏賓

my name is... 斌
but it is an interesting misunderstanding.

你也是一片白雲

我們考試成績是尾三尾二
我們就是這樣認識
成了好朋友
已是十五年前的事了
記憶猶新
你一直在我心裡佔有非常重要的位置
人大了，我也變了
我的強烈性格卻把你嚇跑了
我就這樣一手破壞我們之間友誼

我幾乎以為是恆久的友誼

我知道我甚麼都不能做
我知道我錯了
原來

你也是一片白雲

Description from the other perspective

heartless, unfaithful, non-humorous, non-delightful, non-supporting, forgetful, reckless, mindless, not-single-minded, no-focus, non-diligent, unintelligent, illogical, careless, non-polite, manner-less, not presentable, egocentric, provoking, bothering, annoying, nagging, no respect, no priority, picky, not trustworthy, cheesy, unclean, stinky breath, untidy, dirty, messy, lazy, lack of passion, not romantic, short, skinny, poor, unrealistic, irresponsible, no love, lie lie lie, me.

一片白雲

我浮起來了
我終於都浮起來了
心裏越是沉重
身體就越不受地心吸力控制
懸在本空

我慢慢的讓自己往上飄
想靠近一下
這些年來
我總是攪不懂的
一片白雲

我飄得越近
你越變得模糊
我在你裡面
想把你捉緊
我卻完全迷失了

我越靠近你
越看不清楚你
還是靜靜的在遠處
悄悄的欣賞
你這可愛的白雲

Stupid me

i can't help thinking about you either
i should have managed myself better
i could have stopped the suffer earlier
and you would have no more tear

i'm extending your pain
and putting your hope in vain
only because i love you my dear
i'm doing all these stupid things

The great camping with viv

I must have been crazy. on tuesday night after work i went camping with Viv! and planned to go back to work the next day. and i am glad i did that.

We went to MuiWo after work and got some food at MuiWo. then we walked.. walked... and walked towards the hill after the Silvermine Bay... at night, in darkness. we climbed the hill in about 1 hour and then we were there! at the top of a ridge. I have been there before, here is the album

We found a good spot and then we tried to set up the tent and i found that i didn't have the pugs (the nails for the ground securing the tent in place) We then went everywhere to found some rocks.. it was not easy! no rocks on that ridge! we finally managed to get around 8 rocks.. it was so stupid

we setup the tent, took some rest, then we started walking around inspecting the place at night. we took some lights to a big rock at that place, and Viv lit up the rock for some photos. it was funny.. no one do that ever i think, and Viv was a true creative guy. the rock looks exactly like a big monument on the hill!

we then ate alot of snacks then fell dead exhausted. at night it was freaking cold and we didn't bring blanket. i almost got sick! we curled ourselves to overcome the night. Next morning before sunrise we woke up and wanted to look at the sunrise. it was cloudy but didn't matter, Viv was so excited. it was his first time camping in a tent and i have been persuading him to go camping with me all these months!

It was cold in the morning and we headed down to Discovery bay at 8. there were alot to see during the walk and it was really a quality walk. my knees still hurts but they were alot better already.

At last we took a ferry from Discovery bay and back to central. i took a shower at Viv's place then i go back to work! crazy! and i felt sleepy all day!

More pictures will be posted ASAP.

My FIRST helicopter ride

today my photographer friend had an aerial shooting job and he invited me to go with him! I was too excited since this is my childhood dream coming true. i even turned on the Flight Simulator to practise how to control a helicopter... and to get a better knowledge what is going on with the pilot!

Marcel the photographer got a aerial shoot for the 8th highway connecting HK to China. He knew that i wanted to ride a helicopter so bad and he asked me to go with him, pretend as his assistant. Wow what a great idea!

We meet at the Peninsula Hotel (the best hotel in HK!) I was stunned by the lobby immediately. it was my first time going in! Then we went to the top floor of the Peninsula Hotel, and there is an aviation lounge! wow it was so cool... the lounge was so fancy and comfortable, and well furnished. We waited there and we had to look at a DVD briefing about the safety stuff, then we had to write down our weights.

We met the Pilot and his name is Ray, i guess he's either an Aussie or British. couldn't hear him really well. he is so tall. Then we walked to the roof... there are 2 helicopter field at the top of the hotel, and we flew from there! first time to get onto the helicopter i feel so excited, not nervous at all!

The helicopter was quite small from the interior and it's not much spacier than a Van, 4 persons can sit in the back. We have buckled up before take off. The typical high pitch starting sound of the rotatary engine makes me happy. I was too excited i even forgot when the helicopter really started the engine. i can read most of the gauges and i know how to use the radio! thank you Billy!

Everyone had to wear that typical headsets, with the mic over your mouth. i feel so pro!
it took off... it was so smooth i couldn't feel anything except the scenery became smaller and smaller.. and i am in the air above Tsim Sha Tsui!

Then i immediately tried to lean myself out of the door (there's no door actually, the door was removed) to look down. it was so much fun. i didn't have any fear of height at all. and everything was new. Marcel was sitting by the opened door he only have 2 belt to tie him to the moving helicopter. he was the one sitting almost outside.

We flew across TST, Laiking, tsuen wan, then over Castle Peak, yuen long, and finally we got to mai po where our work begins.

there's a bridge called Expressway No.8 and we flew over that bridge a few times. sometimes we hover, some time we flew fast to find a sight. During the time i took some pictures with my GR1 and sometimes i took picture from Marcel's Hasselblad XPAN2. wow. a great camera.

Of course flying is a lot of fun and fun usually pasts faster. we finally had to go back, we flew over the Container Port and TST again, when i see central at the higher angle it is just amazing. TST is beautiful!

The landing was smooth too, i didn't feel a bit of bump. The pilot sure did a great job!

you can view the album here

You

jumping around
making sound
looking up
laying down

my knee hurts
I can't help
thinking of u
nothing else

Flight Lesson from Billy

Today I met Billy and he drove me to his new home. Nice place! We played a lot of stuff and he also showed me some magic tricks. amazing! Best of all we talked about flying and things like becoming a pilot. He is already a private pilot so he taught and shared a lot of flying stuff to me.

He taught me how to read maps, how to navigate with map and compass and avionics, and he also explained how to use the panel on the real airplane! We used the flight simulator to learn about all these.. Now i know how to use most of them! of course, Navigation on the plane is not easy at all! I learned to fly a plane also!(in the computer only) it was awesome! i was totally amazed... we had a great night!

We also had an indian curry dinner and a nice long talk!

對不起 我愛你

多麼想用說話留住妳
心中想說　一生之中都只愛妳
為何換了對不起

今天分手像我完全負妳
這傷痛盼望輕微　望妳漸忘記

我　每日也想著妳
靠在這街中等妳
遙遠張望　隨妳悲喜
視線人浪中找妳

行近我又怕驚動妳　我又怕心難死
立定決心以後分離　一生裡頭
誰是我的心中最美　往日的妳

Physiotherapy

Finally i had to switch from the chinese doctor and go back to the "good old western way".
I have seen an Orthopaedic Surgent. (some doctors, "famous for bones") Finally someone is patient to listen to the patient.

Luckily, my case is pretty bad, but not serious to the point that it's gonna be forever. I just need to do some physiotherapy for a few times. Again, i hope, my insurance is going to cover it. those are not really expensive, anyway.

I always thought that physhotherapy is that in a room (like a ballet practicing room) there are some soft mattress and some fitness balloons on the floor and people roll their body on top of it, or, some kind of rail that a person need to hold on and walk 2 meters per minute. i was wrong. it was a small room. 2 beds inside and a few strange machines, that's it. it's less than 80 sq. feet!

I had to do 2 things, one is ultrasonic therapy - some blue gel spread over my knee and a nurse using an ultrasonic device circling or massaging over my knee cap. it's like what people do when they are checking their babies in their womb. this time it's not a camera but just something to make my bruised and swollen "soft bones" inside my knee heal more quickly, and ease my pain.

The second thing is a strange machine and it has 4 stuff to cup around my knee. they sucks. literally. they suck my skin and created a little bit of vacuum, and then they release some electricity to activate my muscles... my muscles were twitching in a rhythm for about 15 minutes! it was a weird experience.

I do hope this really works. i want to climb mountains and do all these sports again!

PSP

When PSP came out it was mind blowing. the screen, the technology, the graphic, the quality of the games, the price. i loved it and i would want to have one for myself!

Now after a couple of years everyone has a PSP. even all 5 year old kids have a PSP. in the MTR everyone is carrying a PSP. in the bus everyone is playing with a PSP. In the classes the kids are talking and thinking about PSP.

It's such a successful product, almost everyone had it, even the older people uses it. I didn't have it, and now i hated it.

Think of this way. every 5 to 16 year old has a PSP. how can they afford it? their parents. Their parents are either 1) spoiling their childrens and risking with their academic result, 2) the kids are kidnapping them selves if their old mans don't buy them the PSP there would no longer be father and son.

And the 2nd fact was most probably quite common. If a kid don't get a PSP from their folks they would die in front of their parents. The will have no self-esteem in front of classmates. There will be no meaning of life for them. they will have no interest in sports or collecting stamps or whatsoever anymore. Because they don't have a freaking PSP.

I went to the Golden computer center last night. What did i see? Father and sons buying PSP. The sons are pointing this and that and seems so pro and talk with the shop keepers. Fathers? asking for the price... where will he have warranty... can they buy pirated version games instead of the throat-cutting priced games (for the children standard).

What is wrong with the world? kids are bringing their parents to shop. They won't be a good children if they don't have a PSP. they won't study hard because they cannot relax with the PSP after the stressful school life. They just won't behave without the PSP. Sport? do it in PSP. Study? study the games of PSP. Healthy hobby? Do i need to mention?

Now what happened? PARENTS COMPROMISES. They had to please their sons by spoiling them with PSP - I would say, the ultimate evil product from SATAN ever created for the kids in the early 21th century.

Jan Svankmajer rules!

What celebrity do i look like?

wanna try it? click here

Thought of the minute

I miss that troubled, hopeless, innocent, inaccessible, hard to be understood, yet friendly and easy-going, special and unusual, smart but weird, mysterious, give unexpected responses, laugh all the time, silly, talented...little cute creature.

Fade into you

A bird flying through the clouds.
Someone gave me a knife.
I wanna hold on to something.
Cactus growing in my mind.

Outdated film, rotten fruit.
A mouse on my desk.
Look left, look right.

Loneliness wiping out the night.
i go home.

Piano sounds as good as it was,
but i am a different person.

push, kick, swing, slam.
Music playing so loud, I couldn't hear what you say.

You go away, you come close.
Stirs up my emotions.

You asked me what is going on,
i said, just shut up and kiss me.

My legs, the Doctor, and Ben Law

My feel hurts today and i bought a hiking pole to support myself. don't know if it's useful. my knee hurts when i stand up and carry heavy stuff.

After i know that the insurance can cover my medical expenses (since this is an accident) I went to see a general doctor in the morning, and then i went to a chinese doctor in the evening. the chinese doctor is interesting...

After that ben and me had a wonderful dinner in yau ma tei, we "da lang" on the street all night talking basically everything!

Sorry, Sifu, Hello, Kenny!

AHHHH again i need to scream. i totolly forgot that today was the fantastic driving lesson! damn! i totally forgot and i was having dinner with my friend Kenny... Oh damn the teacher called me when i was having dinner.. he said "hey it's your driving lesson today.." and i was like.... "OOOOH SHIT!" i am not sure if he's mad or not..

I was having a great dinner with my friend Kenny in Pepperonis, Soho. He's another good friend long time no see. He brought his new girlfriend along to dinner too. they look so happy together. i bless them all the best!

My feet... hurting more everyday. it is because i started to be aware of them more and more, or i am really loosing them? the feeling from the joints got greater.

My knees! am i gonna be crippled?

AAAAAAAHHHHHH!

my knees are going bad. started to feel pain. dunno if it is related to the taiwan hiking. Something it is hurting me underneath the skin, like some needles poking me. I can't even use strength or carry heavy stuff... the joint hurts when i walk.

i went to the doctor before i felt pain.. and she said it could not be healed.. i can only rest. and my knee joint bones are getting bigger because they are grinding each other...in an abnormal way

can i still walk in 5 years time? (is my travel insurance covering it?)

boring bloooooooog

i just found that other people's blogs are much more intersting to read, and mine were just a boring, flat description of life. ahh this tasteless, hopeless junks should change...

My second driving lesson

Oh my. I practiced changing gears at home by imagination. And it worked! My gear changing was smoother now, and I am driving much better than last time! Still getting the feeling of the steering wheel, the throttle and the brake. I need to familiarize with the feeling of controlling the car, rather than learning what to do with the car.

But today i had alot of fun driving! i even drove home by myself! hahaha

Chaos day

I feel dull right now.

Everything today went wrong. Work is not smooth.
Miscommunication.

I maintained to have an optimistic mind
but i don't have a good mood.

My first driving experinece

My First driving lesson!!!
after dreaming for many years finally have a chance to learn driving.
i drove right from the start! i sat on the driver's seat!

Oh my god i always thought i knew how to drive and i didn't..
the clutch and the gear stick and the hand brake and the brake and the throttle and the steering wheel and the mirrors... too many things to take care of in the car, not including the road and other cars next to me!

too many things happens at once, it was more scary than enjoying. i need to practise more to get used to it, make it a subconcious thing!

Long time no see, Billy!

I finally met my friend Billy. I have lost contact with him for around 2 years. He is my very very close friend, and I met him since were 9 years old.

He drove a yellow mini cooper to pick me up for lunch. How cool is that! He look great, the same shape, but bigger. He is going to look like his dad. I was so happy to see him… and we kept talking and talking, just like we have to talk through everything in these 2 years.

Wow many things happened. He went to USA and got a private pilot license. Opened up a unique sport training business (lacrosse! You know what that is?) and got back together with his ex-girlfriend. I like them a lot. They look like the perfect match.

He is always cool and funny. Probably a little bit more mature than we were 10… it has been 16 years already. I couldn’t express how happy I am seeing him and making sure he’s okay. I just couldn’t wait to see him again very soon.

I really care about him, and I bless one day he will become a real airline pilot very soon!

Pioneer CDJ

Suddenly my brother got a Pioneer CDJ! That's another thing besides his 2 turntables and a mixer. It was so cool! i played and scratched with it, it feels like a real turntable but it plays CDs! It also have alot of other functions that a turntable dosent have... i am still exploring it, and i really hope my brother will become a real DJ soon!

...Tomorrow will be my first day to drive, i am having my first driving lesson in kowloon!

Mood Swing / Friend's new company

I woke up this morning i didn't feel like having a good mood.

I had a a lot to do today and i decided not to do any of them. i was about to go casting, i didn't want to go. A friend invited me to dinner, i didn't want to go. i don't know why this happened. i just don't want to do the thing i need to do.

as usual i did a lot today in office. after work my friend Tak called me for help about computer stuff in his new office. (he wanted me to go visit him and fix the computer also) After a long consideration i said yes and went there.

it was so cool! the office is simple, clean and presentable. i liked it alot. it is a really comfortable place. i hope he can do good business there!

Wish my bad mood can go away tomorrow!

Driver's test - written test

Oh yes, alot of things happened to me today. just like this year.

I got my driver's test - written test today,
and i think i have got all the answers correct!

I received a book after applied for the test. i studied hard in it! i marked the book, and i read it while going to work... i studied like when i am in school! then day before the test i heard someone that the test is REALLY easy - you only need to read the book once before you go to the test!

Every question i read 3 times. I finished the test in around 5 minutes out of the 20 minutes allocation. To be safe, i rechecked the whole test 3 times to make sure all the questions are 100% correct.

Am i exactly like a student? yes! but i am 15 years too late to be a good hardworking student! Is it the German Way of studying? ha i love German stuff

Well i will really work hard to learn how to drive a car well! it has been 8 years of waiting, can't mess it up!

Ricoh GR1

Finally after 5 years i get my own Ricoh GR1!

It's a second hand i got from a shop which is a good price... HK$1500.
yes, it's HK$1500. it's a great amount of money for a small film automatic camera.
but this is something you can keep, a must-have for any photo enthusiasts.

then i got it. I am glad! I finally joined the club! can't wait to see the first roll...

Photography Assistant

I am a photography assistant again today!

Working with my best buddy Pak today. I used to work with him everyday, to assist his photography. Today I helped him again for a few hours, the good feeling comes back!

I am able to think during work finally.I am the one who keep thinking how to make things better. My brain has never been so clear! there are so much mutual understanding in between us and it is like a perfect team!

... i think it's better for me to work in a studio instead of an office...

First day at work

After almost 45 days working out of town, going back to my office seems to be a new experience to me. I almost did not recognize my desktop. it was such a mess. many people moved my stuff, and the room was a chaos.

I could not get the right mood to work, so i spend some time checking my portfolio in ebay, in the wildtrekking.net forum, and gmail. i was having a great time in my office relaxing...

well then i just realized i need to "getting my things done" so i started to really work... first i figure out what i need to do after these crazy days, sort them out and categorize on a paper, then find the most important things to do first.

then i get back to my busy working days just like i didn't leave at all...
boring, isn't it?

"other people make a living, we make a life"

talked with my indian friend Vivek about something in life. we actually love to share these thoughts.

A taxi driver said he's gambling soccer and horse racing to kill free time. To Vivek and me, "to do something to kill free time" seems to be the most luxury waste... where other people like us don't have this luxury.

to us, it's like a westerner talking to some starved children in Africa: i am too full to eat the food on the table. let's throw them away.

At first we would think, "oh that's cool, they have free time to spend, and we are busy like hell" then after a minute i think that they are so poor coz they have nothing meaningful to do in life, and we stuffed our life with all kinds of things. we lives life to the max!

thus Vivek comes up an indian word or wisdom: "other people make a living, we make a life"

My first post

Hi everyone it's me!